communication

Communication

I have been paying close attention to javaeye, for a friend of mine is one of its strong supportive members.

I read articles he writes and comments from others to try to understand him, his work and his life better.

Today is my first day of registration and having no rights in presenting or replying in other bulletin sections other than green hands sect.

I am no programmer, having or will have no experience in programming or any other work related to computer technology.

But my friend suggests I should try to talk sth about communication. His words inspires me.

I don't know more than 4 ITs. But 100% of them are good at typing to talk instead of facing.

So I think "communication" here as a topic should be beneficial and helpful.


I am not a linguist, but as "community" means an area with groups of people, "communicate" must be talking between these individuals.hahaha.

Of course, in savage time, communication is by gestures and growls.

In acient time, communication is by gestures, languages and writings.

In modern time, communication is by gestures, languages, writings, typings, sms and other possible channels.

However, advancing of technology contrasts to decreasing of face to face communication.

A programmer, or to be better a title-software engineer, communicates more with computers than people.

Maybe at the beginning he is a easy-going guy but the more he faces the computer, the less he talks in real world.

Take my friend as an example, he is a very good guy with colorful and profound mind. In the other end of msn, you will find a talkative and sunshine man. But face to face, he appears timid and when he is under pressure, he will stammer.

I don't say it is common to all programmers but it could be a problem to part of them.

My work relates to sth like public communication. I hope in future we could set some section or topic in the forum about it.
Some software engineers may have to face-to-face comfort clients with complaints and some have to do presentations to sell products, so "communication" is also necessary to be discussed here as a technical topic.

I know feelings have been forbidden topics here. I suggestion we talk about only communications in work.


To prove that I am a green hand in coding and computer, I want to ask those warriors," how on earth to change English input method to Chinese?"

评论

39 楼 basicbest 2007-06-14  

小螃蟹 写道

引用

I completely agree with you on this point.

"on these points",,,,,i think, maybe,,,so,,,dont 欺负 me,plz....

无论大小，螃蟹都是横着走的，如何才能让她直着走呢？？？

对不起,我说的是我完全同意他的上面我引用的那句话的观点而不是全部观点所以还应该是on this point.

直走和横走是相对的.只要目的方向正确就行.

不同的是我可以换个角度看世界.也许这样可以更清晰.

我不用回头看过去,因为我一直在注视着过去现在和将来.

爆有水平的回帖，javaeye出现仙女  

38 楼 小螃蟹 2007-06-14  

basicbest 写道

小螃蟹 写道

Communication

I have been paying close attention to javaeye, .............

正好，今天回了几个帖子有提到沟通的事情。
比如这里 http://www.iteye.com/topic/77846
虽然javaeye这里也有讨论沟通，但往往被过分技术化流程化了，但是communication最重要我觉得是感受对方的感受，然后才能知道如何应对，然后才能较好的交换自己的感受，然后才能。。。嗯，好像应该在一瞬间完成，这个先后顺序是推理出来的，呵呵。
所以，

引用

I know feelings have been forbidden topics here. I suggestion we talk about only communications in work.

我觉得谈谈feeling还是很重要的。。。。
用“觉得”这个词会不会被所谓理性的人BS？？？？

引用

how on earth to change English input method to Chinese?

呵呵，有趣的论据。。。。。。
还是个绿脚小螃蟹，哈哈


另外，我觉得这个帖子值得转到《软件开发和项目管理》坛子里去，女人在沟通上有天生的优势，这个话题其实可以解决非常多的项目管理中的状况。所以。。。。再次召唤站长，搬帖子啦。。。
欢迎小螃蟹的到来

非常感谢你的关注.我很高兴来到这里和朋友们讨论.
项目管理的话题我也非常感兴趣.

37 楼 小螃蟹 2007-06-14  

引用

I completely agree with you on this point.

"on these points",,,,,i think, maybe,,,so,,,dont 欺负 me,plz....

无论大小，螃蟹都是横着走的，如何才能让她直着走呢？？？

对不起,我说的是我完全同意他的上面我引用的那句话的观点而不是全部观点所以还应该是on this point.

直走和横走是相对的.只要目的方向正确就行.

不同的是我可以换个角度看世界.也许这样可以更清晰.

我不用回头看过去,因为我一直在注视着过去现在和将来.

36 楼 basicbest 2007-06-14  

小螃蟹 写道

Communication

I have been paying close attention to javaeye, .............

正好，今天回了几个帖子有提到沟通的事情。
比如这里 http://www.iteye.com/topic/77846
虽然javaeye这里也有讨论沟通，但往往被过分技术化流程化了，但是communication最重要我觉得是感受对方的感受，然后才能知道如何应对，然后才能较好的交换自己的感受，然后才能。。。嗯，好像应该在一瞬间完成，这个先后顺序是推理出来的，呵呵。
所以，

引用

I know feelings have been forbidden topics here. I suggestion we talk about only communications in work.

我觉得谈谈feeling还是很重要的。。。。
用“觉得”这个词会不会被所谓理性的人BS？？？？

引用

how on earth to change English input method to Chinese?

呵呵，有趣的论据。。。。。。
还是个绿脚小螃蟹，哈哈


另外，我觉得这个帖子值得转到《软件开发和项目管理》坛子里去，女人在沟通上有天生的优势，这个话题其实可以解决非常多的项目管理中的状况。所以。。。。再次召唤站长，搬帖子啦。。。
欢迎小螃蟹的到来

35 楼 basicbest 2007-06-14  

lszone 写道

楼上全部是火星人，鉴定完毕！

刚好我在你楼下。。。。。难道，，，，我是传说中的漏网之鱼？

34 楼 basicbest 2007-06-14  

cookoo 写道

Obviously there's a dizzy crab between lines here. LOL

What you've talked about reminds me of my business communication textbook. Yet points 1-3 are actually about how to approach a person. It is P4 and P5 that are about understanding.

Understanding people is hard if not always. People won't tell their mind easily and often unconsciously omit many important assumptions since they may think you've already known, or even worse when they imply something on purpose. To read one's mind, a quick and easy skill is to rephrase other's words by saying, e.g. "Do you mean..." or "Are you saying..." to make sure you understand them correctly. Be careful this skill can also be offensive or embressing in certain circumstances depending on cultures.  

Hope you be fine soon~

小螃蟹 写道

cookoo 写道

Nice reading indeed. There's an old saying that "Business is all about communication." though a bit of exaggerated.  Also agree with you on understanding. "First to understand then to be understood" is such a rule of thumb.

I am very glad that you agree with me.

Understanding have several steps:

1. Side-way messages: Before you have chances to talk or communicate to an individual, you may have heard of or collected side-way information or anecdotes about him/her. These related have mixed others' opinions and judgement but still could be taken as one of a resource to understand. And most of understaning we reach when we couldn't talk to a person face-to-face is from side-way messages analysis.

For example, we worship heros or celebrities but we may have no chance in our life to meet them, especially the ones who passed away before we come to life,hahah. Our feelings rise from understanding of their brightness of side-way messages.


2. Appearance judgement: for those who we are luck to meet ourselves, we will be prompt to an apperance judgement. Although our parents chattered a lot about not judging from appearance, we still keep on doing. And it should be considered as a very important factor when we try to find some one to talk in an unfamiliar party or crowd. You are easy to accpet this concept- he looks easy-going and considerate, maybe I could have a try to talk to him; he looks conservative and stubborn, I prefered talking to a monkey to chatting with him.

3. First impression: first impression here means the talking first impression. The topic or hobby your target prefers will have a crucial point on your impression. That is the factor to decide whether this will be the last talk you have with him for the rest of your life.

4. Further communication: When you have listened to his words or stories, you should start contribute to the communication. Otherwise, it will become his speech time or talk-show.

5. Full communication: this is the highest level you reach.

What I am talking here is targeting at the one who is timid to talk or actively to set a target to talk.

Next time I will try to explain more for the above 4 points. Please present your opinions and suggestions.

I am in beijing these weekends and just landed on shanghai. I am so unluck to have the worst pilots in the world. I am dizzy now and please forgive my wording or any unfit points.

不错，这招得小心，对脾气燥的且敏感的人不能用这招，他会觉得你在侮辱他。

33 楼 basicbest 2007-06-14  

小螃蟹 写道

shaucle 写道

引用

个人体会:会communication的人一般会比不会communication的人学习能力强一倍以上.而且其差距随着复杂程度程指数上升.
(当然上网也算一种communication)

I really appreciate and admire that you could connect communication with learning capability by index. Could you refer me to such kind of articles?

I agree with you internet is a way to communicate and I have described in the first article the ways of communication in modern time. However, I have to clarify my "communication" here is only limited and defined as face-to-face communication.

引用

communication其实很需要环境.

I think atmosphere should be created actively but not to wait others to set a bridge to communicate.

引用

很多老程序员整天盯着电脑,只有处理任务时才可能开下口.(更多还是用了email,msn)
会communication的一般可能当了pm,这也体现出了差别,但pm又太忙了.

Management team and common staff are all busy with work. The difference is manager is busy in work planning and assignment while common staff is in execution. According to varied characteristics, people are fond of varied jobs. Communication is not aiming at promotion but in better and smoothier life.

引用

当然另一点不能乎略的是勇气.
有时候许多沉默份子也不是自己想沉默,只要你主动一下,还有一些是蛮积极的.

I completely agree with you on this point.

"on these points",,,,,i think, maybe,,,so,,,dont 欺负 me,plz....

无论大小，螃蟹都是横着走的，如何才能让她直着走呢？？？

32 楼 lszone 2007-06-12  

楼上全部是火星人，鉴定完毕！

31 楼 小螃蟹 2007-06-12  

lordhong 写道

can we please use JMS for this topic discussion?

... purely floating by ...

恕我愚钝, JMS是java message 吗?

怎么用啊?

我不懂技术,也是刚刚用这个论坛.

30 楼 lordhong 2007-06-12  

can we please use JMS for this topic discussion?

... purely floating by ...

29 楼 shaucle 2007-06-12  

//I really appreciate and admire that you could connect communication with learning capability by index. Could you refer me to such kind of articles?

that's based on a simple principle, you can always learn things from others.
what's more, when it's getting more complicated, there are often many traps, communication can best avoid this.
there's no way to tell how to communicate, but just feel, and be with them.

//I think atmosphere should be created actively but not to wait others to set a bridge to communicate.
exactly right. but it's not one guy's job, so it's often better to choose than create, unless you are the big brother.


//Management team and common staff are all busy with work. The difference is manager is busy in work planning and assignment while common staff is in execution. According to varied characteristics, people are fond of varied jobs. Communication is not aiming at promotion but in better and smoothier life.

varied jobs need communication even more, otherwise there will be a mess of the project.
Communication is aiming in better and smoothier life, that's a insighted point, and with that it often comes with the promotion of yourself and the whole team.

28 楼 cookoo 2007-06-12  

Obviously there's a dizzy crab between lines here. LOL

What you've talked about reminds me of my business communication textbook. Yet points 1-3 are actually about how to approach a person. It is P4 and P5 that are about understanding.

Understanding people is hard if not always. People won't tell their mind easily and often unconsciously omit many important assumptions since they may think you've already known, or even worse when they imply something on purpose. To read one's mind, a quick and easy skill is to rephrase other's words by saying, e.g. "Do you mean..." or "Are you saying..." to make sure you understand them correctly. Be careful this skill can also be offensive or embressing in certain circumstances depending on cultures.  

Hope you be fine soon~

小螃蟹 写道

cookoo 写道

Nice reading indeed. There's an old saying that "Business is all about communication." though a bit of exaggerated.  Also agree with you on understanding. "First to understand then to be understood" is such a rule of thumb.

I am very glad that you agree with me.

Understanding have several steps:

1. Side-way messages: Before you have chances to talk or communicate to an individual, you may have heard of or collected side-way information or anecdotes about him/her. These related have mixed others' opinions and judgement but still could be taken as one of a resource to understand. And most of understaning we reach when we couldn't talk to a person face-to-face is from side-way messages analysis.

For example, we worship heros or celebrities but we may have no chance in our life to meet them, especially the ones who passed away before we come to life,hahah. Our feelings rise from understanding of their brightness of side-way messages.


2. Appearance judgement: for those who we are luck to meet ourselves, we will be prompt to an apperance judgement. Although our parents chattered a lot about not judging from appearance, we still keep on doing. And it should be considered as a very important factor when we try to find some one to talk in an unfamiliar party or crowd. You are easy to accpet this concept- he looks easy-going and considerate, maybe I could have a try to talk to him; he looks conservative and stubborn, I prefered talking to a monkey to chatting with him.

3. First impression: first impression here means the talking first impression. The topic or hobby your target prefers will have a crucial point on your impression. That is the factor to decide whether this will be the last talk you have with him for the rest of your life.

4. Further communication: When you have listened to his words or stories, you should start contribute to the communication. Otherwise, it will become his speech time or talk-show.

5. Full communication: this is the highest level you reach.

What I am talking here is targeting at the one who is timid to talk or actively to set a target to talk.

Next time I will try to explain more for the above 4 points. Please present your opinions and suggestions.

I am in beijing these weekends and just landed on shanghai. I am so unluck to have the worst pilots in the world. I am dizzy now and please forgive my wording or any unfit points.

27 楼 lordhong 2007-06-11  

冉翔 写道

小螃蟹 写道

zhuyi8319 写道

I don't know more than 4 ITs？怎么翻译

我认识的IT总共加起来不超过4个。也就是我对做技术的并不是很了解。所以所有的评论也仅是猜测而已。

    8知道美女有米有兴趣认识the fifth

  友情UP一下~~~~~

26 楼 小螃蟹 2007-06-11  

shaucle 写道

引用

个人体会:会communication的人一般会比不会communication的人学习能力强一倍以上.而且其差距随着复杂程度程指数上升.
(当然上网也算一种communication)

I really appreciate and admire that you could connect communication with learning capability by index. Could you refer me to such kind of articles?

I agree with you internet is a way to communicate and I have described in the first article the ways of communication in modern time. However, I have to clarify my "communication" here is only limited and defined as face-to-face communication.

引用

communication其实很需要环境.

I think atmosphere should be created actively but not to wait others to set a bridge to communicate.

引用

很多老程序员整天盯着电脑,只有处理任务时才可能开下口.(更多还是用了email,msn)
会communication的一般可能当了pm,这也体现出了差别,但pm又太忙了.

Management team and common staff are all busy with work. The difference is manager is busy in work planning and assignment while common staff is in execution. According to varied characteristics, people are fond of varied jobs. Communication is not aiming at promotion but in better and smoothier life.

引用

当然另一点不能乎略的是勇气.
有时候许多沉默份子也不是自己想沉默,只要你主动一下,还有一些是蛮积极的.

I completely agree with you on this point.

25 楼 冉翔 2007-06-11  

小螃蟹 写道

zhuyi8319 写道

I don't know more than 4 ITs？怎么翻译

我认识的IT总共加起来不超过4个。也就是我对做技术的并不是很了解。所以所有的评论也仅是猜测而已。

    8知道美女有米有兴趣认识the fifth

24 楼 小螃蟹 2007-06-11  

zhuyi8319 写道

I don't know more than 4 ITs？怎么翻译

我认识的IT总共加起来不超过4个。也就是我对做技术的并不是很了解。所以所有的评论也仅是猜测而已。

23 楼 zhuyi8319 2007-06-11  

I don't know more than 4 ITs？怎么翻译

22 楼 shaucle 2007-06-11  

个人体会:会communication的人一般会比不会communication的人学习能力强一倍以上.而且其差距随着复杂程度程指数上升.
(当然上网也算一种communication)

communication其实很需要环境.
很多老程序员整天盯着电脑,只有处理任务时才可能开下口.(更多还是用了email,msn)
会communication的一般可能当了pm,这也体现出了差别,但pm又太忙了.
当然另一点不能乎略的是勇气.
有时候许多沉默份子也不是自己想沉默,只要你主动一下,还有一些是蛮积极的.

21 楼 firebody 2007-06-11  

引用

自我介绍:

张牙舞爪的小姑娘


职业: 供应商管理
爱好: 欺负人
个人主页:

wow, so cool .

maybe you above commented  should read this stuff,we can know this pretty girl a little more ..

20 楼 lordhong 2007-06-11  

小螃蟹 写道

1. how old are you? it seems that you have suffered a lot of struggles in life. you are so eager to be in Utopia.

2. what is your vocation? it seems that you are a machine-world assertor.

3. Do you have someone you love, you trust, you respect?

I was just exaggerated a little bit...

I'm a Pentium III (奔三) programmer.  I have someone I love, I trust, and I respect; I'm living a perfectly normal life.

引用

I agree with you that many people may have dreams of Utopia but I definitely disagrees machines are honest and obedient while human beings are not.

Human beings are deceiving by nature... there's nothing wrong with that.
When your life is on the line, anything can happen...